Technology really burns our bacon sometimes…
Ben: “I hate how technology dehumanizes people. Whether it be by swiping, taking a long time to respond to a text, ghosting, or saying brash things we wouldn’t ordinarily say, we don’t treat people with the same courtesy through technology as we would in person. We also don’t present our full human selves through technology, but rather a crafted version of our image that is not entirely authentic.”
Jacqueline: “I feel like technology has shortened our attention spans. We read things–books, articles, messages–on tiny screens while multitasking, and so everything has gotten shorter. We fast forward through commercials. So there’s less feeling comfortable in the “space between things”, or knowing how to just sit in awkward silence, or enjoying slowing down, or luxuriating in just being. I both like those things, and physically need them. And I find it hard to find that in romantic partner, especially in New York. It makes me feel like the odd person out a lot.
On today’s show, we continue our exploration of how technology affects relationships with Matt Lundquist, the founder and director of Tribeca Therapy in New York City. He guides us through both how we can take our online interaction less to heart, and how we can better set ourselves up to get more satisfaction out of our personal interactions IRL. How can we more authentically present ourselves to the world through online social platforms? How can we slow down when a potential romantic partner is seated across from us a table? How can we meld what and who we aspire to be with all of the technological tools out there to help us become that person?
About Matt Lundquist
Matt Lundquist is a psychotherapist who works in Lower Manhattan helping adults and couples with issues related to pain and happiness, work and love, and intimacy and anger. Matt is the founder and director of Tribeca Therapy, a group practice specializing in working with creative people who are looking for an alternative to couch-based practices, labeling, 6-year old copies of the New Yorker, or who simply hate therapy. As a therapist, Matt has been influence by both the study of philosophy and the practice of the creative arts. Matt is a part of a growing turn toward non-diagnostic therapy–an approach that rejects the “medical model” and instead, invites therapy-seekers to collaboratively participate in shaping their therapy. Connect with Matt on Facebook and Twitter.